Something A Little Different - Re: White Buffalo's Destroyed Cellphone, And My Defense
White Buffalo was pissed off at me for a long time over his broken cellphone. He's mad because it contained some specially made apps designed to defeat demons and other evil supernatural powers. Don't ask me how it works. I'm specifically referring to the 'Godzilla' app. I believe he named it after a song by Eminem (posted below):
Another app, not used for supernatural purposes, is the 'Eye of Mao' app. All it does is hack and gain control over a Chinese spy satellite hanging over the United States. But it's nothing special, it has no supernatural effect. It's just another mundane app.
White Buffalo's Godzilla app is special, but difficult to use. It's purpose is to trap demons inside his cellphone. I don't know how much memory this uses up, but I imagine it's not very much. The demon, I mean, not the app. The difficult part of using this app is trapping demons who've had thousands of years practice in avoiding various types of traps. As White Buffalo said:
"He [the arch-demon Cocabiel] kept running into the granite mountain face to escape me, then he jumped out throwing plague demons into my flesh. Then he hid in the rock face again. I killed his passing demon baseballs." I think 'demon baseballs' is a metaphor for the plague demons. He says they invaded his flesh, but his quote gives the impression that he killed them. But I was there, and my personal recollection is that he didn't kill them, he missed them, thus his constant vomiting and painful retching at the time. To continue his baseball metaphor: he swung, and he missed. He sounded pathetic, bent over retching into the ground. His recollection however is that he killed the "baseballs." I'd call this a case of selective memory. I recorded the event with my digital recorder, and on the recording I don't hear him killing any "baseballs." I hear vomiting. So that's that.
So the Godzilla app didn't work because wiley old Cocabiel didn't give it a chance to work. White Buffalo ended up using yours truly as bait to lure him out of the granite mountain face. I was unaware that I was the bait - the 'wounded rabbit' - in his Godzilla trap. If it didn't work out, I'd likely be in Hell right now. And that's not the only time White Buffalo put my life at risk in order to test one of his inventions.
But the purpose of this post is not to whine about how I was kept in the dark regarding one of his dangerous inventions and then used as a test dummy. Due to the fact that it was night time in a forest, I was unaware that he was trying to use a specialized phone app to trap Cocabiel. No, the purpose is to show my position against his false accusation that I destroyed his cellphone. I'm not the one who caused an earthquake, resulting in a landslide that destroyed his cellphone. White Buffalo caused the earthquake, therefore, he caused the landslide that accompanied it. He'll claim, very loudly and with much pointing of forefinger, that it was me that caused him to have to call for an earthquake in the first place. But since he was never able to recover his cellphone, he doesn't know if it was destroyed or only lost and not destroyed.
Now I'll admit that having been buried in an avalanche and landslide is a good case for declaring most things destroyed. But there's no proof. He has to prove it. And even if he does, I'll just say that he shouldn't have hired me in the first place. And that's that.
PS: White Buffalo won't see this post, so I'm not worried that he might think poorly of it. He doesn't read this blog unless there are profuse compliments aimed at him and only at him. He shares my posts with his friends only when they are complimentary, almost worshipful of him. But worship of White Buffalo is not one of the purposes of this blog.
Another app, not used for supernatural purposes, is the 'Eye of Mao' app. All it does is hack and gain control over a Chinese spy satellite hanging over the United States. But it's nothing special, it has no supernatural effect. It's just another mundane app.
White Buffalo's Godzilla app is special, but difficult to use. It's purpose is to trap demons inside his cellphone. I don't know how much memory this uses up, but I imagine it's not very much. The demon, I mean, not the app. The difficult part of using this app is trapping demons who've had thousands of years practice in avoiding various types of traps. As White Buffalo said:
"He [the arch-demon Cocabiel] kept running into the granite mountain face to escape me, then he jumped out throwing plague demons into my flesh. Then he hid in the rock face again. I killed his passing demon baseballs." I think 'demon baseballs' is a metaphor for the plague demons. He says they invaded his flesh, but his quote gives the impression that he killed them. But I was there, and my personal recollection is that he didn't kill them, he missed them, thus his constant vomiting and painful retching at the time. To continue his baseball metaphor: he swung, and he missed. He sounded pathetic, bent over retching into the ground. His recollection however is that he killed the "baseballs." I'd call this a case of selective memory. I recorded the event with my digital recorder, and on the recording I don't hear him killing any "baseballs." I hear vomiting. So that's that.
So the Godzilla app didn't work because wiley old Cocabiel didn't give it a chance to work. White Buffalo ended up using yours truly as bait to lure him out of the granite mountain face. I was unaware that I was the bait - the 'wounded rabbit' - in his Godzilla trap. If it didn't work out, I'd likely be in Hell right now. And that's not the only time White Buffalo put my life at risk in order to test one of his inventions.
But the purpose of this post is not to whine about how I was kept in the dark regarding one of his dangerous inventions and then used as a test dummy. Due to the fact that it was night time in a forest, I was unaware that he was trying to use a specialized phone app to trap Cocabiel. No, the purpose is to show my position against his false accusation that I destroyed his cellphone. I'm not the one who caused an earthquake, resulting in a landslide that destroyed his cellphone. White Buffalo caused the earthquake, therefore, he caused the landslide that accompanied it. He'll claim, very loudly and with much pointing of forefinger, that it was me that caused him to have to call for an earthquake in the first place. But since he was never able to recover his cellphone, he doesn't know if it was destroyed or only lost and not destroyed.
Now I'll admit that having been buried in an avalanche and landslide is a good case for declaring most things destroyed. But there's no proof. He has to prove it. And even if he does, I'll just say that he shouldn't have hired me in the first place. And that's that.
PS: White Buffalo won't see this post, so I'm not worried that he might think poorly of it. He doesn't read this blog unless there are profuse compliments aimed at him and only at him. He shares my posts with his friends only when they are complimentary, almost worshipful of him. But worship of White Buffalo is not one of the purposes of this blog.
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